Over the past year or so God had taught me, by His severe mercy(though not nearly as severe as it is for some people…maybe semi severe mercy is more appropriate), about what grace means. For several months He took away my sanity and pretty much my ability to function as a mother (something I used to think I was pretty good at). A few months after I gave birth to my third child Eva I experienced relatively severe postpartum depression. I was completely emotionally unstable and very much not patient with my children. God brought me to a place of total humility, I had to pray continually. The verse “Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” was a verse that God continually brought to mind. What does it mean to be joyful always? Be happy and perky all the time? Obviously joy is much deeper than happiness. Joy is resting in the fact that God is in control of all our circumstances and its not in our hands. When we can look at our lives from an eternal perspective it makes it much easier to “give thanks in all circumstances”. God will work all things together for the good of those who love him. We too often misunderstand what it means to “work all things together for our good”. “Good” doesn’t mean that our lives will be easy, Jesus’ life on earth wasn’t easy, it wasn’t easy for his disciples, why would we ever think it would be easy for us. Our job is to pray continually, give our lives over to God and be confident that all the bad things that happen to us are either from Him in order to make us more Christ-like or they can be used by Him to make us more like Him. God has given us what we do not deserve, we deserve to spend all eternity in hell because we are all sinners but he has given us an eternity in heaven with him. Because he has shown us so much grace we MUST also give grace to others. Apart from the obvious way which would be telling people about Him. We must do this in the subtle areas of our lives. We must love people whom are not easy to love. We must show respect to people who have not earned it. And assume the best, not the worst, when we are unsure of someone’s motives. So much to work on…

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