Over the last month or so I have been praying Ps 139:23-24 “Search me of God and know my heart, test me and know my anxious thoughts, see if there is any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting”. Its taped to my bathroom mirror. But with all the busyness of traveling and potty training Eva I haven’t looked in the mirror in…weeks.

A week or so ago we found out that Geoff was getting yet another pay cut. I am not usually very easily shaken, in fact I actually prided myself on being “a rock” as Geoff put it. But this time I was shaken, we had to cut most of our giving and our already small food budget. As I was scouring the internet for inexpensive healthy meal idea I found myself getting more and more stressed as I realized I was already doing all the thrifty thing that the healthfoody/budgety blogs recommended. I was frustrated with God, we have been living so sacrificially and we have been giving so much and now God took away our ability to give….as I was thinking this thought I realized how proud I was of what we were doing with our money instead of giving the glory to God for everything. Everything we have in a gift from God, Geoff’s job, even the fact that Geoff and I are always on the same page in our dealings with money is a gift from God, who we are and how we are in from God. So I was very ashamed of my pride. Then I looked at my mirror and saw Ps 139. Wow God was testing me and had revealed my anxious thoughts and offensive ways. So then God gave me another verse: “Do not be anxious, about anything but in everything with prayer and petition with thanks giving present your requests to God and the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus”. Then a friend called and asked if they could borrow some diapers because they couldn’t buy any until the next pay check….wow…good perspective. It is sooo important to keep things in perspective. I was just reading an article in the World Vision magazine, this video sums it up….well I can’t link to the video so click on “5 Days of Hunger 12 minute video”.

Something in the article that was not mentioned in the video was when she asked the grandma what she would like to feed her family if they could have anything she said beans and rice…which is what we eat when times are tough….good perspective.

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